Thursday, February 12, 2009

Epilogue

Being married to the love of your life is not like dancing on clouds, or running across the milky way galaxy, in fact, I have no idea what to compare it to, because it is incomparable. The beginning, the literal honeymoon period is like heaven on earth:

Chillin on the beach with my sweet huz

chillin on a boat with my sweet huz

chillin at a waterfall with my sweet huz

chillin before parasailin with my sweet huz
chillin at sunset on the ocean with my sweet huz

We had the perfect honeymoon. And we had the perfect first few months of marriage, because we still believed that we could do no wrong. We stayed in bed all day on Saturdays and laughed when people said that the first year was the hardest. And then it was. And six months into our marriage I freaked out. I suddenly realized that I was tied to one person for the rest of my life and he was not at all the same person that I started dating. That person bought me flowers all the time and wrote me love notes and laughed at everything I said. This new person in my bed was so different; he farted all the time and we argued over who would do the dishes in our sink. At that point, if our commitment was to eachother and not to God, we would have failed. I would have run away from the situation, like ive done in so many others, and he would have drowned himself in some substance or another. Because God was working in our lives though, He taught us how to treat eachother with love and respect. He renewed our love for eachother, and made us see eachother through different eyes. See, I don't think that you can love a person until you can see them inside and out. Until youve seen them at their weakest, most unimpressive state. Until youve woken up next to bad breath and tried to go to the bathroom in the night only to find that they forgot to flush. Once youve seen all of that, and can still say that they are the most lovable human being on the planet, then you can have an accurate perception of where your life together will go. Until then, its only small talk.

Omar and I are learning to love eachother unconditionally, and in situations where other relationships would fail, we flourish. Weve chosen to be gentle with eachother's hearts, accepting of eachother's faults, and willing to work to change the parts of ourselves that are taking away from the whole of our relationship. We have gone from the deep infatuation of our engagement, to a lifelong commitment, centered around our authentic love for eachother and for God.

I wrote this in January of 2007, and its more true now than ever:

in song of soloman the beloved (the woman) urges her friends three times to "not arouse or awaken love until it so desires" and i completely understand why she is so persistent about it. all i want to do is tell all of the people around me in my loudest, boldest voice to WAIT FOR THIS, wait for the plan that God has for you, DONT WASTE YOUR TIME on anything else, it will come when both hearts have been prepared. and it is SO worth waiting for. but i know that this is one of those things that you have to figure out on your own, and when you do you'll want to shout it to everyone and no one will listen because they are still figuring it out on their own. conundrum.

To the many sweet souls who took time out of your lives to read this: Thank you.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Chapter 16: You and I were made to worship

I wrote this the day after we got engaged: I always thought that my dream to dance on clouds was literal, but i know now that i was wrong. Dancing on clouds is actually the feeling you get when you know that youre going to spend the rest of your life with the most incredible person you've ever met.

If that is true, then knowing that in a few hours you are going to promise your life away to that same person is like running barefoot across the milky way galaxy.

We had several interesting situations that made the day a little chaotic:
The first was during breakfast with my bridesmaids when we discovered that the slideshow DVD that one of my sweet friends spent 3 days on, was not actually the slideshow DVD. It was actually something totally scandalous that belonged to my brother in law and that would not be the best choice of wedding entertainment. In fact, I think we couldve gotten sued for showing it. Since almost everyone coming to our wedding had already taken the five hour journey from Vegas to San Diego, we called everyone we knew that was coming to the wedding. Our wonderful friends, Tracy and Jose, were already at stateline, but turned around and followed our instructions to break into Jill's house to ge the laptop the dvd was made on. Problem solved.

In addition, After Hours tux shop is not for the faint at heart, particularly not for the bride who wanted NO black outfits at her wedding, particularly in her bridal party. You know, the bride who picked out champagne colored tuxes with light salmon vests and ties just to stay away from the traditional black tux wedding. After Hours apparently didnt get the memo that I didnt want my gay-exboyfriend-groomsman to look like he was the groom in all of my pictures. So, fifteen minutes before the ceremony began, Jon came upstairs quite apprehensively. When I saw him I had my single bridezilla moment that obviously consisted of calmly telling Jon that it didnt matter what color tux he wore (or lecturing the sweet lady on the phone at After Hours for five minutes straight about how they, oh my gosh, totally ruined my entire wedding). Apparently, at some point I got over it because when Omar sent the message that his dad, who had flown here all the way from Venezuela for our wedding, had gotten lost and had not arrived yet, I was calm and collected.
So, we waited the extra half hour for him to find his way, and in spite of these few mishaps, the best day of my entire 21 years of existence began:

The Entrance

My precious bridesmaids, using teamwork to tie up my dress. It didnt take nearly as long to be taken off. Did I just say that?

These sweet girls do this with me quite often, this time was particularly special.

Our wonderful photographer, Bobbie, thought that this group of strapping young men crying and praying together was one of the most touching things she's ever seen. I agree.
My best friend, Jessica.

My (step) dad, who has walked along side me for every important moment in the last 14 years.

He has the most tender heart out of anyone I know. Don't tell him I told you that.

Everything we ever dreamed of.


"Building a marriage is alot like building a house...." -Pastor David, in reference to the houses in Mexico that my BFFS and I built together.
One of my favorite parts of the ceremony, Pastor David brought the pink, sparkly, hammers that we blistered our hands and built memories in our hearts with.

"A cord of three strands is not quickly broken..."

"Allie, I love you with all of my heart. You are my soulmate and my companion. I remember exactly one year ago today when we started our journey together. I knew on that day that we were meant to be together to share Christ's love with the world. I pledge my all to you just as Christ gave His life for the church. In sickness, I will nurse you back to health. In health, I will encourage you on your path. In sadness, I will help you to remember. In happiness, I will be there to make memories with you. In poverty, I will do all that I can to make our love rich. And in wealth, I will never let our love grow poor. Nothing can, or ever will, change the unconditional love that I have for you. Til death do us part."

I take you Babas, to be my husband, my best friend, my soulmate, and my partner in life.. You have shown me what it means to love, to forgive, and to endure, and more than that you have given me a walking example of God’s incredible love. You have nurtured me, sacrificed for me, protected me, and provided for me. I promise to give you every part of my heart that belongs in human hands. I promise to always be faithful to you and deserving of your trust. I promise to laugh with you and cry with you and to offer you words of hope and life. I know that our love is a gift from God, and I promise to treat it as that, and to love you with all that I am for the rest of my life.
Big ol' kiss the bride smoocheroo!

Real, authentic, I hope no one is watching, Ohmygosh we just got married, smoocheroo!


Little sister Olivia, BFF Jon, Brotherinlaw Omar, BFF Whitney, Our friend Austin, BFF Jess, Cheesy smoochey newlyweds, BFF Allyson, Omar's BFF Tyler, Younglife friend Katie, Younglife friend Mark
Almost all of these guys have single-handedly held me up at different times in my life, so thankful they still do.

Man, he is a hunk.
My beautiful girls, with their sparkling smiles and change-the-world hearts.

Our fam.

Sweet sweet, July 29th sunset on the beach kisses.


Love my sweet bridesmaids, dontcha know?

The redeemed slideshow, and delicious sushi bar.

The night before the wedding, we choreographed this dance in a conference room at the hotel, it was evident.

It had to be you, it had to be you
I wandered around, and finally found
The somebody who- could make me be true
Could make me be blue or even be glad
Just to be sad just thinking of you
Some others I've seen might never be mean
Might never be cross or try to be boss
But they wouldn't do
For nobody else gave me the thrill
With all your faults I love you still
It had to be you, Wonderful you, It had to be you!

Sweet dad, always stepping in, without stepping on my feet.

The best overpriced cake in the world. Our little friends were a tad anxious.

Austin Byrd, the giant wrestler that introduced me to the concept of God, caught the bouquet...of course.

Omar's sick awesome dance moves are CLEARLY genetic.

Our wedding was the epitome of my perfect fantasy. God's evident love shined brighter through my groom that day more than ever and kissing him at the alter was just like that moment in Never Been Kissed where Drew Barrymore realizes that she is kissing the last person she will ever kiss in her life, but better because it was real, and because our fickled, wayward, hearts had found a home in eachother for all of eternity.

And they lived happily ever after....


Stay tuned for the "Epilogue"