Friday, January 2, 2009

abounding abundance

If I could title 2006, I would call it "Preparation," the year that God prepared my heart for what lies ahead. The year He taught me how to be a leader, gave me vision for my future in working with people with disabilities, and the year He showed my friend Omar and I what He created us to be, husband and wife.

2007 would be, "Transformation," the year that everything that I ever knew about my life was completely transformed. God reshaped my heart, my friendships, my family, my home, my school, my work, my church, everything. By July of 2007, everything I had ever known was changed into something knew and unfamiliar, and it was an adventure and a half.

I would call 2008, "The Sacred But Insane Year of Transition," the year that demonstrated how challenging it is to be in between, contradictory. I wandered into depression, and was rescued from it (see, I struggled with being a wife and a woman, learning how to love unconditionally and wondering what God has planned for all of the components of my dreams which were quickly evolving and always changing. I have cried at the funeral of one of the most significant people in my life, and I have marveled at Omar's success as a musician. I have been blessed by friends who have stood by my side and have not allowed the new logistics of my life to change our friendships. I have felt complete despair and overwhelming gratitude. I have lost and found hope, and have struggled with my faith more than ever. But, I have made it through smiling.

I pray that 2009 will be the year of "Growth, Expectation, and Revelation," a year that is abundant in authentic relationships, healing, and growing so close to God that I am completely taken by his love and mercy and eager to listen to His spirit. I hope specifically that I finish school with a profound knowledge of how to serve people with disabilities, friendships, and a clear vision of what God wants me to do with my degree. I pray that Omar will develop his gifts, be freed from his inhibitions and anything that is holding him back, and that he will find a sense of self that comes from God, and that by this time next year God will began to shape his heart to become a dad (theres your answer, people, were hoping to have babies sometime in late 2010, but we know that humans dont come into the world on our time so- whatev). I hope that the people I love will discover fullness of life, and that God will use our relationships to draw us closer to him. Actually, I pray that God would allow us to completely change the world, and that this time next year our lives will be nothing like what we expected but so filled with hope and joy and love and laughter that we will constantly look around and wonder how we've been so blessed. Mostly I hope that we will learn to be alive. Abounding in abundant life.

I think were off to a good start.

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