the journey home

i want a Nikon camera, a little girl named Grace, some hot chocolate, flaming hot funyuns, snow, forest animals that help me clean my house, new acrylic paints, patience, for my deodorant not to smell like it was used my a certain latin man that lives in my house, a new home for kitty, some rocky road ice cream, and to sleep tonight without having dreams of my friends being pregnant.

but most of all, i want you, Lord, in all of your godly, unconditional glory. i want your love to turn me inside out and shake me up a little bit, okay, alot, and i want to be carried by you through the valleys and up the sides of the mountains. i want to dance with you barefooted on the mountaintops in the midst of the clouds and the dandelions and i want you tell me that its okay to be afraid, not of you, but of everyone else. i want to ask you a million questions without answers and i want you to kiss me on the forehead. i want to worship you with my hands in the air and my knees in the red dirt of morrocco, knowing that you find my childish visions of heaven endearing and not ridiculous because
i am your child
and you are my father, and as many times as i fail you and fail myself and fail others you clean me up and pick me back up and carry me home. thank you for resurrecting me and restoring me and showing me that there is hope and healing and redemption that can only be found in your love.